Medicated depression, day #177
Woke up early and snuggled a bit with son, laying in bed talking about bits and bobs. Had breakfast and watched some Youtube clips together.
Felt weak and tired, retreated to bedroom and listened (snoozed) to a few podcasts.
Wife have been offered and accepted a position at a hospital in the next town over, requiring a short commute of ~80km/day, three days per week as it's a 60% position. Yay! I'm so proud of her!
She will work 2 days at her clinic and 3 days in next over town.
Then there is always dips in life and obstacles, our fridge is starting to act up, not holding temperature, sometimes too high temperature, above 5°C and sometimes too low, close to 0°C (freeze point) and it ruins the vegetables. The freezer has already given up the spirit and has been turned off since last fall, when we got a smaller replacement freezer. So we started out on the hunt for a fridge+freezer combo of a specific height that fits in our kitchen .. blah, they are either too tall, 186 cm or too short as 175 cm, while the "hole" have the height 180 cm, no more and no less.
Wife found a few options, we're thinking about it .. it doesn't need to happen any time soon as the fridge is still functional. But the kits we found range from €1800 to €3500 roughly and that is not amounts you just cough up like that .. at least not in my world. Careful planning and strategic purchase.
My brain is still mushy, I had overload from just watching the news, had to go lay down for a bit, the news makes me sad, very sad. The world is going to shit as I see it. Where is the love and kindness? All I see is war, conflict and cutthroat-politics. Sometime it overwhelms me, I start to think about that the world wouldn't miss me if I fell over the edge .. well, wife and son would. They keep med sane. But thoughts touch other things as "I brought my son into this messy world, he's gonna hate me later .."
I may look happy on the outside, but deep inside I'm still very sad and broken.